If any of Carina aka i-am-clak's friends come across this, she's injured herself quite extensively. Today was our grandmother's funeral, and at about 7am, she had gotten up to go pee and when she was done, she got up, had "something pinchy" in her foot, hopped on one foot to get it out, accidently plunged her foot into my aunt's 2 feet hamper and fell. She has major bruising all over her left leg and other body parts, fractured her left ankle, pulled joints and tendons in her knees, fractured both her wrists from breaking her fall with her hands, fractured her smaller toes on her right foot and sprained her neck. She missed the funeral because we obviously had to take her to the emergency room. She's going to have to stay in Seattle for awile until she feels well enough to fly back to Montreal. So wish her a speedy recovery

I started lactating when i was 13 and have never had babies of my own except for the angel twins, but this was before that. please read about it in pevious blogs, they were my brown eyed angel and my blue eyes angel baby girls that live in Austin now and have a range rover. now they both got matching sports cars, corvettes, they are reaaly into cars, they probably got that from me that was always a tomboy. I know they both got nose jobs and boob jobs already. they also got my minus nothing chest and black purple person nose. they still don't know that i exist even thougfh i promised myself that whenever i got to making 100,000 a year i would come out to them. My mother told me when she visited that time in miami that my dad could accept anything from me except for lesbianism. i had three lesbian staying with me in south beach at the time, and my mom could here them fucking and one of them after a few margaritas seduced my mom and they made out even though my mom won't admit it because she blacked out and made me delete the pictures that i took just when camera phones were starting to come up so the pictures really sucked and it could have been any two lesbians making out. the fact of the matter is i have always told my mother about my lesbianic tendencies and that i am ambiguously attracted to men and women that are ugly. I got fucked so hard by my 20 yo cousin that is a marine the other day that i am oficially done with attractive people because they feel like porno stars and that isn't what sex is for me. sex for me can be a foot massage or me alone trying to fit the heel of my foot up my ass with lavender canddles and miguel bose playing. if you havent heard his music he is out of this world. americans only know him for his part in the movie suspiria which by way sucks so bad. he plays the lousy ballet dancer that is jessica harpers love interest. he can't dance but he can sing and he can sure fuck even though he is gay. he came to cali when i was 11 or 12 before the twins, and he gave a concert and stayed at the Melia Hotel which was owned by my father at the time so i had the key to the presidential suite he was sharing with a newspaper boy he had picked up down town. i gave the kid 10,000 pesos to get out of the picture and slipped Miguel Bose some Robinol which basically turns you into an idiot into his mimosa one morning. We used to crush Robinol into our coffee at the teachers lounge when i went to the opus dei school that fucked me up so much. i was molested by a nun. after he drank the robinol i entered his room and gave the first and best blow job of my life and i was lucky to have a perfect 9x9 cut dick that was the exact same tone of skin as his legs, because that was before i learned that some guys can be fair skinned or olive or even a light black and have a black or dark brown or darker dick than the rest of the body, and i realy don't like that. he had a perfect white dick that seemed made out of porcelain and it was the most beautiful thing i'd ever seen and it reminded me of my grandmother's porcelain life size bady jesus' little chubby arms. after that it's all been downhill. pyramid shapped , trumpet, muppet, or teeny weeny. that's when i started lactating. We had a sugar cane ranch and the lady that cooked for us when we went there and cooked for the workers when we weren't had a daughter that has the guiness record for the youngest mother ever. she got her first period at 3 years old and her baby at 8 or 9. i had to breast feed her baby because she was too young and all the other women in the ranch had either gone through menopause or had Hep C. Premature menopause runs in my family. I got my first grey hair at 14 and my first pubic grey hair at 19. I started tweezing the greys until it got so bad that my entire pubic area was white and i couldn't keep up with the tweezing and that when i started electrolisis and laser but i wasn't making much money at the time so i bought the do it yourself kit and got second degree burns and terrible scars and no more pubic hair but plenty of scars that i've been taking care of with laser surgery little by little. I removed a tatoo from my ankle myself with very rudimentary tools. I had had a falling out with my bff and we had both gotten matching twin lady bugs. It was about the size of two quarters. I cut around the tatoo with a bisturi and then just peeled it from my flesh. it was like the movie in my skin but i was so high on god knows what that i didn't feel a thing. I then stretched the skin around together and stitched it together. I stitched it religiously every night for two weeks and buried the tattoed pice of skin under the metasequoia we had planted together as little girls along with a lock of her auburn hair. The youngest mother ever Opa got to go on the Show de Cristina, and will never forgive my mother for not telling Quaaquaa that Pele had payed a $10,000
fee for being on the show and she had taken it and put it in mine and my sisters trustfunds. to this day i search every day for little Quaaquaa to give her her money that she needs more than me. I have never needed money in my life and hate money. I have hired private eyes and excons and nobody has been able to find her. Shum had his show come to Colombia to put families together after the Armero tragedy and couldn't find her. She must've died under the mud avalanche that wipped out the entire town. I had a pine forest planted in her memory over what one day was her hut. She was part jurupari and part wayuu and spoke seven languages